I want new words

I want new words

I want new words

 

I want new words

A scribe to write

Lines of verse

Painting out

My breaking heart

 

But poet’s words

Are yards from truth

When plain speech

Hits dartboard

Center

 

Words like

I’m lonely

And I miss you

I’m sad we don’t have

What we used too

 

I don’t know

If I want to come back

Because I’m not sure

If you’ll still be there

To return to

 

Hope has never

Been so uncertain

Faith so unfaithful

And peace

So full of fear

 

I’m fearful

Because I’m not

Sure what I should do

Or if I do come back

What I’ll come back to

 

I worry I’ve missed

An important part

That I haven’t found

The solving piece

And I’m lost

 

What’s my guide

Now?

That I’ve set it aside

Aimless maybe

But not misled

 

I don’t feel like

I’m going

Fast or far

Maybe I’ve sat down

Sitting on the ground

 

I fight this urge

Telling me to get up

It’s time to go

But maybe no

Maybe not yet

 

Here’s me defying

I am not going yet

I’m not ready yet

I need more time

I need to close my eyes

 

I want to listen

Closer than I have

Ever listened

And breathe

Deep and slow

 

I’ve been so worried

About getting somewhere

But maybe it’s deeper

And downer

That I need to go